I heart Spray Paint

So, I've been "out of work" for a couple months now and am basically bored to death. I've never been one to deal well with boredom. My Mother always told me to be weary of an idle mind. In her words, "an idle mind is the devil's playground". However, in this case.....an "idle mind is Pinterest's playground". When I'm not spending hours upon hours applying for jobs online (a tedious and torturous process mind you), I can most certainly be found on Pinterest. Of course, this is after my wifely duties have been completed around the house. Cough cough.

Now, I've always been pretty resourceful. Even before the magical world of Pinterest existed, I loved refurbishing furniture, making bows, garage saling, etc. As you can imagine, Pinterest has opened up a whole new world for me. A world of magical possibilities. I believe I can fly.

Without a job to put my millions of little brain cells to work each day, and to keep my idle mind safe the devil (lol), I have been quite busy with projects around the house. I've painted a couple rooms, refurbished a few pieces of furniture, switched some rooms around, decorated to my heart's content, and last but not least......I've been busy spray painting!! You simply have no idea how much you can spray paint until you start rummaging. My son says he loves the smell of it so we all win here....

I went to the feed store up the road and purchased myself a few cans of paint, then came home and literally walked around my house looking for stuff I could paint. Imagine me walking through my house holding half a dozen vases and jars making my way to the basement. That's precisely what happened.

This is what I came up with.

Here you have a standard mason jar.

 

Now, you have a cool flat black mason jar with a festive bow and some greenery and cattails. I have a thing for cattails....

 

Lovely.

 

Here we have a standard old milk jar. Cute, but could be cuter.

 

Now it's a cute pen/pencil holder on my desk. I also painted this flat black.

 

Another once ordinary mason jar.

Looks swell on the bookshelf doesn't it?

 

I forgot to take a before picture of this one. I was so excited. I thought I was done painting for the day, until this caught the corner of my eye in my living room. It was metal. Just plain ol' metal.

Now it's a satin ivory. Beautiful.

 

 

I am also quite into refurbishing ugly furniture. I do that when I'm spray painting jars and vases.

 

Here's a few furniture pieces I've done recently.

 

I got this desk in the trash. True story. Someone was throwing this gem away. After I politely knocked on their door (it was sitting at their curb) to verify that it was indeed free (seemed hard to believe I guess). They responded with a sarcastic "if you can load it, you can have it". I merrily skipped back to the truck to tell my husband of the great news! We quickly found out why they spoke with such a tone. It's a beast. I still to this day don't know how the two of us successfully loaded it in the back of the pickup. I'm certain they watched us from behind their blinds, their ribs just splitting with laughter.

 

But who's laughing now?! Muahahahaha. Me. I am. That was me laughing. Look at this beauty. It took me FOREVER to refurbish this puppy, but the hard work was worth it. She's glorious.

 

I had a before picture of this dresser, just don't where it went. I picked this dresser up at a barn sale for $30 a couple months ago. We got er painted and spray painted (naturally) the hardware. It's in my daughter's room now. What a beaut.

 

Sadly, I don't have any other pictures to bore....I mean share with you today.

 

I hope you enjoyed yet another blog post about Pinterest. If there's anything I know for certain in this world.....it's that there aren't enough blogs about Pinterest.

 

The end.

 

Be on your way.





Yuletide & Merriment Galore

Tis the season for all things lovely and wonderful! Every year about this time I regress to the innocence of my youth, back when I believed in the jolly bearded big guy, Santa. What a guy, with those rosey red cheeks.

Anyway.

I love this time of year. I love this time of year even MORE now that I'm a Mom. It's WAY cooler to live out the traditions of Christmas through the eyes of your kids. I love that my husband and I have merged some of our own childhood traditions, as well as made up our own. It's even more thrilling now that my daughter is old enough (6 years old) that she can remember the traditions from last year, and anticipates them again this year! Way cool.

One of the more popular traditions this year is the good ol' Elf on the Shelf. Heard of him yet? If not, your rock is too big. Come on out, the weather is fine. ;)

I will educate you on the Elf in case you're somehow not familiar with him. He is a magical elf that spontaneously appears in your home to "watch" your children, and then every night while they're sleeping he flies to the North Pole and "reports" their behavior to Santa. He flies back home just before they wake up, and is in a different spot than the night before. Typically, he has done something mischievous or is being silly.

One of my favorite things about having a blog is that I get to say whatever I want, and there's nothing anyone can do about it. So, that's what I'm going to do now. Say whatever I want.

It's been my observation that Christians, in particular, have been fairly opinionated about Mr. Elf. (Technically, that's what I'm doing right now too.....but remember that part about it being my blog?) I've seen many people blog/post about how Mr. Elf is taking the magic of Christmas too far. Heck, we already lie to our kids about Santa's existence. At least that's what they're saying. Lies. Puh. I disgree. Moving on.

Here's how I feel about Mr. Elf and Santa. As a parent, it is my responsibility to protect and guide my children, and that requires making sound decisions based on our beliefs. Nowhere in the box that Mr. magical Elf comes in does it say that I MUST use Mr. Elf for the way he was intended or else.......
So, we bought Mr. Elf. However, we're doing things a tad differently. I'll explain since I'm sure you're dying to know. Ahem.

Santa delivered this package a few days ago. That's right. Gasp. Santa mailed my children a package. It was fun and magical.

 

 

The contents of said package. Mr. Elf - now named Fred, and a typed letter from Santa. Basically, the letter says that Santa thinks they're special so he mailed them a special Elf. Santa talks about Jesus (I stole that idea from another blogger - don't give me any credit for that). He talks about the importance of Christmas and why we really celebrate. He introduces them to this magical Elf and why he's here. Our elf didn't come to our home to spy on my children and run back to Santa to tattle every chance he gets. No no. That would be horrible and my kids would immediately hate him. Who wants a spy? Besides, we don't talk much about the naughty or nice list in our house. We talk about making good choices 365 days a year, so it's not really necessary for us to shove the whole list thing down their throats 30 days before Christmas. There's no grace in the whole list anyway.

Santa gives grace. Even though he's not real. Whatever. Details.

Back to the letter. Santa thinks they needed some responsibility and asked that they keep an eye on this magical elf because he tends to be silly. He comes alive at night while they're sleeping and runs a muck. A muck I tell you!

 

My daughter's face when I read the part about him coming alive at night. Priceless. How can you not love this?! :)

 

Logan waiting for him to blink.

 

They only rule? They can't play with him. He won't lose his magic like it states in the book - but he's not super durable and my three year old son would most certainly tear him to shreds. At $29 a pop, we don't want that now do we?

I'm not sure who's having more fun with Fred? The kids or my husband and I. Every night is like Christmas Eve with Fred. They're so excited to get to sleep, because that's when the magic happens. My husband and I fight over who gets to place him and where. Not actual fights.....just 4 year old "hey it's MY turn" fights. I should probably relinquish my responsibilities of Fred though, as "he" nearly burnt the house down roasting marshmallows this morning. The details aren't important, but Fred has a second degree burn on his hand now.

 

So, there you have it. I like pretend magical Christmastime fun. It's a blast.

If you have an Elf in your house, I'd love to know how you're doing things? By the book or did you also tweak it?

Happy day y'all.

 

 

 

Things That Don't Belong On Pinterest

It's no secret that I have an adoring love for Pinterest. The recipes that I'll never make, the fabulous clothes that I can't afford, the how-to's that never turn out like the picture, the few hilarious e-cards, the home decor idea's that I could never actually apply to my own home, I just LOVE Pinterest.

However, there are days that I scroll through the beloved feed and see things of a perplexing nature. Things that make ya go "whhhaaaa???". Things that cause me to be concerned about our culture.

Allow me to share a few examples of the things that "don't belong on Pinterest". That's what I call them. Clever, huh?

The first picture up for discussion - The "wine sippy cup". Yep. That's right. A sippy cup for your wine to prevent those dreaded spills while driving or just perusing the house. And also because it's fun to sip your wine from a childlike cup.

Sticking with the wine theme, how about a "wine bra?" For those days that you want to be a full two cup sizes larger, you simply fill your bra up with an ENTIRE bottle of wine. And to trump the already amazing bra filled with wine, you can DRINK the wine straight from your bosoms from a little nipple attached to a tube.

 

Your fence slats are too wide for your miniature dog? No problem. Just use this nifty dog stopper collar to reverse clothes-line your innocent pooch when he tries to escape. That'll teach em.

 

 

Look closely. Do you see all that jargon attached to his face? This is called the "brain wave skate board". In case it isn't implied, you steer this here skate board with your brain. Wanna go left? Just think it.....and it'll go. Some may thing this is pretty rad, and maybe it is. However, isn't the image of a skater dude supposed to be.....well anything but this?

 

Next time you're on Pinterest be sure to look for the "Things that don't belong on Pinterest".

 

These are the actual Pinterest projects I've  been working on the past few days. When I'm not skating on my brainwave skate board, of course.

 

 

Wreaths for my cabinets. I didn't make the wreaths. Don't get too excited. I just hung them with a tip I found on Pinterest. I like to keep it simple.

 

 

 

Making an ornament wreath using a metal hanger. This was way cool.

 

 

This is what I look like while stringing ornaments on a hanger.

 

 

The finished product. Not bad.

*Update* I re-did the wreath. The right side of it wasn't right...I'll post a new picture later.

 

 

Lastly, a tomato cage Christmas Tree.  It'll look better on my front porch but my husband won't let me put it out there until after Thanksgiving. I'll post a better picture of it later.

*Update* The leaning Christmas Tree has now been straightened. I'll post a new picture later.

 

I have lots of other Pinterest projects on the horizon. I know how thrilled you are.

 

Until next time......never mind. I was going to come up with a neat catchphrase like Paula Deen, but I got nothing.

 

Happy day. :)

I forgot I had a BLOG!!

I'm not sure how to say this without sounding completely ridiculous, buuuuuut......I forgot I had a blog!!

I was getting my daily dose of Pinterest this evening in my rockin' new recliner (which ironically doesn't rock), and came across this awesome blog. I spent a good 20 minutes browsing her blog totally envious of her awesome posts and cool layout. Suddenly, it dawned on me....I HAVE A BLOG! I created this lil' puppy a couple year's ago with intentions to be a big time blogger. Then I forgot about it. That happens, right?

After spending an additional 30 minutes trying to remember my username and password to the ol' girl (my blog, duh), I finally cracked the code and was in!

Now what? I'm suddenly remembering why I forgot about my blog in the first place. I have a terrible case of writer's block. So, I decide to read my old posts. Good to see I'm no less hilarious today than I was 2 year's ago.

So, how about an update of the last 2 year's of my life for my faithful trusty followers?! (cough cough.)

This is what my family looks like today. That's my dog, Jack. Presh.

I've spent the last year endulging in one of my favorite hobbies, photography. I'm not an expert or professional, but certainly enjoy it. I look forward to expanding my photog knowledge and sharing it with you all. Here I am taking a picture of myself taking a picture. Read that again. You'll get it. It took me two attempts to successfully type it. We can be slow together. :)

 

I took a lot of pictures of shakes like this. I spent a good part of the past 14 months being an entrepreneur in a network marketing company. It didn't pan out like it was supposed to, but hey.....now I have a lot of pictures of shakes and plenty of time to blog. That's neat, right? .........................

I got better at karaoke. This is obviously update worthy. These are important matters of life.

 

Things I grew: My hair. Muscles. A potted plant. A garden. Here I am running a race. Has nothing to do with what I grew. I got a phone call and got distracted with where I was going with this one.

 

 

Oops.....I already covered this one didn't I?

 

Lastly, I taught my son to drive....................................

Now that I've covered all the important stuff that has happened since my last post, I'll wrap it up. I am honestly pretty excited to get back to blogging.....since I clearly enjoyed it the first go around.

Look for more posts throughout the Holidays. I want to create a bit of a "hey, look what we did today" blog. It'll be cool for my kids to look back on someday and maybe (just maybe) it'll entertain some of you.

Good day.

Texting. Its my drug of choice.

There are different levels of texting, and because I am so generous, considerate and bored (mainly its because I'm bored...) I have compiled a quiz of sorts to help decide your level of texting.

The first level of texting is what I call an Unresponsive Texter. I'm sure you know these people well. You probably avoid texting them at all costs. Unresponsive texters don't respond to most text messages (shocking, I know. The title didn't give that one away at all). Sometimes instead of texting you back, they call you. Not only is this incredibly obnoxious, but it completely defeats the purpose of a text message.

The second level is known as a Abbreviated Texter. I don't mean they shorten their words using abbreviations.....patience. I know that's what it sounds like I'm saying, but its not. These texters are extreme. Usually their responses are only one or two words and its like solving a puzzle to figure out what they're saying. I know this level well, as I am married to an abbreviated texter. I could text him a short novel, explaining to him in detail (because that's the only way I tell stories....even in texts. Great detail) of my horrible day and what a ruckus its been. His answer would read something like "sucks hot 3". Translation: "That sucks. Its hot out. Be home at 3." See? Abbreviated Texters are difficult.

The third level of texting is called the Commonplace Texter. Its just as it sounds. Average, ordinary, normal texter. You text them and they respond with an appropriate answer. No need for decoding or puzzle solving and they don't call you. This is the best kind of texter. If you strive for anything in life, it should be to become a Commonplace Texter.

The fourth and last level (and the level that I unfortunately fall under) is called the Incessant Texter. This is the texter that never leaves you alone. They use their text messages like status updates. This kind of texter usually has a "go-to texter". Meaning, they text (annoy) the same person on a regular basis. You hear a catchy new song that you like. What do you do? You text your go-to texter and tell them of said catchy new song. You just did something hilarious that no one witnessed. You have to tell someone. You text your go-to texter. You made up a new word that you think could make you famous. You text your go-to texter. I would like to take this time to formally apologize to my go-to texter. This isn't what I wanted to become and I'm not even sure how I got here. I'm so ashamed.

So, what kind of texter are you? What kind of texter do you hope to become someday? This is about goals and aspirations, people. Its serious.

*I made all of this up. These aren't real.*

The Things We Do To Save A Dollar...

I'm always looking for ways to save a buck to two. I consider myself to be a pretty cheap person. I dislike spending large amounts of money on things that I could get for cheaper....or better yet on things I could make myself. I am not a crafty person, but I pretend to be. I make all my own wreaths for my front door, I make my daughter hair bows, I weave my own baskets...ok so I don't weave my own baskets, but I try to be resourceful by buying them at garage sales.

Tonight I thought it would be a grand idea to cut my one year old son's hair. Not only will this save me $15.00 but it will save me the trip of taking him out to get it done. I cut my daughter's hair all the time, so this should be a cinch. Hmmmmm. Turns out cutting little boys hair is slightly different than girl's. At first I wet it down and cut it straight across the front giving him these nice girlish bangs. When I realized my error, I tried to mask it by cutting down by his ears giving it a nice blended swoop into the bangs. I don't need to tell you how much worse this made it. Being the person I am, I was laughing so hard I was crying when my husband came in and saw my efforts. He said "ohhhh my gosh he looks like Jebidiah". I know I can say this without offending anyone because the Amish don't have the Internet. By this point, I'd done one side so I needed to at least make it even and do the other side. Then my genius of a husband suggested I use the hair clippers. By george, why didn't I think of that?! I know why...because I'm a girl who knows NOTHING about cutting little boy's hair. Surely, I can fix it with the clippers! After all, the boy has his one year old pictures and his birthday party this weekend so we must make thist right. He can't look Amish for that.....However, we are having a cowboy themed party, so maybe it wouldn't be so bad??

Anyway, after a few minutes with the clippers it was actually looking pretty good. I was beginning to breathe a sigh of relief when "buzzzzzzz" I cut a rather large chunk of hair on the top of his head leaving a bald spot. Apparently, the mental high five I was giving myself was a moment too soon. Obviously, there is no covering up his bald spot. I put some gel in his hair and attempted a comb over. Now he looks like a 75 year old Jebidiah.

Pre-comb over.

Moral of the story? Next time I won't cut his hair right before a big event. You thought I was going to say I will just spend the $15.00 to have it cut, didn't you? No.....

Tis The Season.......For Garage Sales!

I have decided to compile a list of things you should know when having a garage sale. There is much more to such an event than one might think.

1.) Decide if you have enough items to have a sale. One table of fifteen year old Christmas knick knacks will not qualify. Evaulate your merchandise carefully. Ask yourself "Self, is this item I no longer have a use for capable of being someone else's treasure?". Half used shampoo bottles are not capable of being treasure. I want to be clear on that. "Sell your stuff, not your trash".

2.) Spend hours upon hours marking your items with price tags so that each and every shopper can ignorantly ask you what your asking price is. If you are having a garage sale to get rich, you probably won't. Garage sale shoppers are bargain hunting. If you're overpriced, they will move on....or go to Walmart.

3.) Adverstisement. Please, oh please take the time to put out proper signage. If you live on the last street in a thirty street neighborhood you will need to.....wait......listen.......put a sign at EVERY intersection. You cannot put one sign at the first street and pray that every shopper miraculously finds your sale.

Use big bold letters when making your signs. Do not attempt to squeeze in every detail of your sale on a sheet of construction paper. Two words "garage sale" and an arrow. Thats it. I gotta be honest. If you can't manage that, then you are not garage sale material.

4.) This is important so really take this one in. Be friendly with your shoppers without engaging in conversation. Some garage shoppers have a unique desire to want to share their entire life story with anyone willing to listen. If you find yourself cornered by a shopper and they begin with their "stories" do not....I repeat....do not appear interested. Swat invisible flies, pretend you're getting a text, fake a coughing spell or asthma attack. Do what you can to flee the situation immediately. Engaging in their stories will bore you to tears, probably freak you out and could potentially lose you other sales.

5.) When deciding on a date and time for your sale you need to be aware that the more dedicated shoppers will show up a half hour earlier than your specified time. Be sure to be punctual. If you advertise your sale to begin at 8:00 am, do not begin your set up at 7:59.....in your jammies. Get up early, shower and look presentable for crying out loud.

There you have it. I hope you find this list helpful while you plan your blessed event.